I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
