Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
