I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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