The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
This is the prime rib incident all over again
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Randomize
