Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
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