i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
you will always have a special place in my vag
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
