The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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