Can Purell be used as lube?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize