you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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