I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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