Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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