Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.