nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
