I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
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