i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
