I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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