when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
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