so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Randomize
