she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
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ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
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Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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