Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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