Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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