There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize