shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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