So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
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