i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
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he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
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Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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