I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
