I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am naked and annoyed.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize