she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize