Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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