I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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