I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
