After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
