i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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