We're like a lot better than the average bears
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
i out mim tonsoeep
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