I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
