the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
