When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
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