today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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