Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
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