he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
