my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
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