he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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