Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick

  (972): View more from Texas

  please tell me you have proof of this

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  (405): the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick (972): please tell me you have proof of this http://tfl.nu/kwvu
  Replies (9) Good night (806) Bad night (4217)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury

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  (248): he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury http://tfl.nu/93f6
  Replies (89) Good night (5619) Bad night (1349)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.

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  (251): I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa. http://tfl.nu/la3v
  Replies (26) Good night (4462) Bad night (762)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.

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  (630): i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons. http://tfl.nu/sim9
  Replies (38) Good night (4964) Bad night (829)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.

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  (604): Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him. http://tfl.nu/v9q2
  Replies (16) Good night (4218) Bad night (1086)
• Favorite

  (647): View more from Ontario

  I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS

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  (647): I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS http://tfl.nu/1k5d
  Replies (35) Good night (8324) Bad night (1229)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...

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  (219): I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break... http://tfl.nu/y0v7
  Replies (22) Good night (3499) Bad night (1174)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Is my lip ring still in your hair?

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  (412): Is my lip ring still in your hair? http://tfl.nu/frbe
  Replies (5) Good night (865) Bad night (1857)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.

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  (802): Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties. http://tfl.nu/nqyr
  Replies (9) Good night (2913) Bad night (635)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?

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  (720): i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today? http://tfl.nu/v6y2
  Replies (7) Good night (1661) Bad night (492)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.

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  (604): I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina. http://tfl.nu/byss
  Replies (3) Good night (1229) Bad night (501)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!

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  (440): I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?! http://tfl.nu/61is
  Replies (4) Good night (610) Bad night (275)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Don't make emojis simulating eating me out

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  (913): Don't make emojis simulating eating me out http://tfl.nu/tdiy
  Replies (5) Good night (762) Bad night (398)
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.

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  (952): The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex. http://tfl.nu/vpuh
  Replies (5) Good night (301) Bad night (584)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.

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  (707): You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks. http://tfl.nu/val7
  Replies (2) Good night (326) Bad night (543)

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