So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
23 Men Confess What Gifts Would Brighten Their Day
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry