why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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