Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
