so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
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