Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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