Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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