That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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