i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize